Feel the grief

You never understand pain until you feel it

you never really feel other peoples pain

or really sympathise with them

nor put yourself in their shoes when you don’t just understand

until now i have considered myself somewhat of a strong person

i hardly cry and would never shed a tear for something less trivial

okay, maybe that’s a lie

i cry, i cry a lot

but then you never know some sort of pain until you connect with it

if you consider yourself emotionally strong

well here’s a series for you ‘This is us’

Related image

i first heard about this series on someones snap and couldn’t help but check it out

It recounts the story of a couple expecting triplets who lost one of the them and adopted another baby.

now am not going to give you spoilers here but, this i can say – every episode shows an emotional moment they brings you back to reality as you connect with these scenes. The first Season which began last year has 18 episodes and the season 2 is already scheduled for the 26th of September.

So check it out -you never know grief till you feel it

With love

Temi_sarita

x

Self-respect

Everyday I wake up I can feel a part of my being moving away,

I can feel that something is taken away gradually from me.

I am slipping away,

myself, my body, my being.

I am losing myself into someone or something that

I feel that i have no control of anything.

I want you so bad that sometimes i feel that i can do anything for you

I need that possession so badly that i feel that i can leave anything for it

It feels so horrible when you find yourself in a situation when

you cannot no longer control your own thoughts

your own actions

when you want to make a decision

and you cannot do it alone

when you put someone else before you

when you are second and even third place in things that matter to your life.

Well,

Hello there,

I am self-respect and those who lose me experience these things

They lose themselves into other experiences

They do things for people to please them

They do things for people for what they can get from them

or what they feel things people can do for them

they take advantage of people and

they are taken advantage of

they are not in control of their thoughts nor actions

what they previously considered as colours then become black and white

they gradually become deceived into thinking the things they loved

Continue reading “Self-respect”

Patience or foolishness

You work me up so much,

sometimes, I feel like am under a spell

Under your spell

I spell that can never be broken

(sigh…)

So, I have to live with it

You are harsh with your words

As they cut into my being

so deeply

I have believed so much in you

That sometimes, I feel

I have no other faith in anyone

because I gave all my trust to you

I complain to my people about your cruelty

and they tell about actions I cannot implement

they tell me to

Hate you

Detest you

Hurt you back

but, I am too good

I cannot hate you

Nor hurt even I strand of your hair

then they call me ‘goody too shoes’

they call me stupid

they call me stupid but am just patience

and here

I am asking myself

what limit is my stupidity

how long can I bear so much hurt

how long will I take the neglect

I stare into the waters

and see as the wind moves the waters and replaces it with fresh ones

and I wish you can be washed away from my mind

sometimes more like I never meet you

but hey

am glad I did

you are a lesson

but for today you are now somebody I use to know

 

With love

Temi_Sarita

x

Ego

I am proud

yes, i am very proud

If i give you rules, you take them as commandments

you live by them and you worship them like a deity

If i tell you to do something, you better take it seriously and do it

I think am better than anybody and everyone

you do something for me, i have to cross-check

analyse, verify

until i take it as the best or at least decent quality

i am picky and i trust no one

do i even trust myself?

I have trust issues, if you disappoint me once

i will never believe you again

okay maybe i would

if my level of trust is on a scale of 1 to 10

for you every single time you disappoint me

you drop gradually down the scale

yes and if you do something that breaks me mentally

i may never believe you again

distance is what i will keep between us

when i walk, i walk straight and tall because any and every other person is not up to my standard

i like my voice been heard and if i see that you are competing with me for the spotlight

you become my enemy and i need to take you down and be in another thing

who are you to share the same limelight with me

i don’t believe in sharing, sharing are for peasants

i am not one of those

i am who i am,

do not deceive me

stay in your own lane

mind your business

Continue reading “Ego”

Life is a pot of beans

they say life is beautiful

they say life is hard

they say life is what you make of it

well,

this might be one of the realest comments yet

but

what does this actually mean

are we truly the author of our destiny

or are we doomed to end up a certain way regardless

do we have choirs do we really

or are they mere ‘choices’ that are in fact not there

because we will opt for the actual one

Image result for life gif

this,

maybe is what we are destined to

are you are believer of destiny

do you feel or hold on to certain beliefs that can influence your life

do you just roll with life

do you just seek to find peace in life

find money

maybe a partner

a house

a career

and the many things society sets as the prerequisites of ‘a successful life’

do you even value success

or how do you even define it

so, you there

Continue reading “Life is a pot of beans”